Welcome to Movies in the Middle

The remote control in mine. In fact, I had it written into my marriage vows.

"Do you, Fred, promise to love and cherish Lynn from this day forward and to never relinquish the remote control?" I DO!

There are many things that irritate my wife, but my incessant channel changing drives her mad. It's not my fault. It's in our DNA. For men, the remote control is exactly that -- control. It is the one thing that we are always the master of. Your boss is a dick? So what, the remote control will do whatever you say. Stuck in the same lane of traffic for two hours? You can change the channel 50 times in a minute if you want. The woman next to you in line won't stop talking? The remote can mute things.

My favorite pastime, and subsequently my wife's least favorite, is watching movies. But not watching an entire movie, just pieces of it. I mean, you can't watch every flick from the very beginning can you? DirecTV has hundreds of channels, meaning that at any moment there is a classic movie on somewhere. So, I flip around and find a movie (or movies) I want to watch, and viola! It doesn't matter if I've seen it 20 times, or even that I just watched it the previous night, I will watch it again and again. Then I will change the channel and start all over again. Thus, Movies in the Middle.

There is no real explanation for it. Dr. Phil has no clue. It like shopping for you ladies. Why must you buy another long-sleeved white t-shirt when you have 11 more at home? You just do. So, I must watch Uncle Buck make gigantic pancakes, then watch Andy Dufresne escape from Shawshank prison and finish it off with Clark Grizwold punching Marty Moose in the nose. Ahh, pure bliss.

So, I will keep track of the Movies in the Middle that I have watched and maybe will inspire a new generation of men to be masters of the art. Keep on clickin!